Oscar-host handicapping is no doubt a favorite past time of award-show obsessives. We lay odds on everything from Who will it be to How will she do to What will she wear to What will she joke about? While the prognosticators parsed the meaning of this morning’s announcement that Ellen DeGeneres has been chosen as the 2014 host, FIND’s Oscar-watchers revealed our dream nominees for the gig.

The Muppets or Amanda Bynes
—Cristhian Barron, Senior Accountant 

Louis C.K.
—Jose Tamayo, Membership Assistant 

John Waters
—Lee Jameson, Film Education Coordinator

Keith Richards
—Pamela Miller, Website & Grants Manager

Louis C.K., kicking it off with his sexual fantasies involving Jennifer Lawrence.
—Maria Bozzi, Director of Film Education

Two words: Lindsay. Lohan.
—Mike Piacentini, Data & Web Manager

A vacuuming Ellen DeGeneres
—Patty Davis, Executive and Board Relations Coordinator

Thomas Pynchon
—Paul Cowling, Associate Director of Film Education

Roz Williams [Film Independent Finance & Administrative Assistant]
—Will Slocombe, Events Coordinator

Michael Winslow [The Man of 10,000 Sound Effects]
—Evan Ward-Henninger, Membership Manager

James Franco and Anne Hathaway…oh wait.  Seriously though, Chelsea Handler or Wanda Sykes.
—Michael Lopez, Director of Institutional Giving & Strategic Partnerships

Eddie Murphy!! Tina Fey and Amy Poehler (either solo would be equally amazing!) Or… Mindy Kaling, she’s just adorable.
—Kady Kamakate, Executive Assistant

Tell us, Awardshow-aholics: Who’s your dream host?